All of my deep thoughts these days are about what I'm studying in school. I doubt you all want to hear my opinion of the Fourth Amendment's exclusionary rule or about which exceptions to hearsay make sense to me or don't make sense to me. I also doubt you all want to hear about why I get frustrated that so many people seem put off that I'm pursuing a law degree. They seem to think that all lawyers are crooks, forgetting that if we don't have good lawyers we'll end up losing our rights and the judicial system might just turn into a tyrannical rule without lawyers holding them accountable. But I digress.
On top of losing my mind to all things law related, I've struggled this week with some discontentment regarding our abnormal weather that I was sure would be limited to last year's winter alone. I've tried to embrace it for the most part, but for some reason something snapped last weekend and I really have felt a little suffocated. I remember feeling this same way during August and September in southern Texas when I was a kid, but for opposite reasons. I couldn't go outside because the humidity and heat would just suffocate me. Now I can't go outside because the wind chill and cold literally makes my face crack. So indoors I stay, cuddled up under blankets with piles of law books next to me to read and then way too many notecards and outlines to memorize.
I know I need to focus on the positives so I don't let myself get down, so if you saw my journal this past week you would see a lot of "so grateful for the sunshine on the snow." I'm trying so hard to convince myself that I can handle two more months of this! ha ha!
Speaking of contentment, my family has not complained yet about my study habits, which is a blessing. And my studying has not inhibited cooking or homeschooling, so really, what could they complain about? Little Cecily Renee is happily enjoying her time in the womb. My morning sickness is still very bearable and is almost nonexistent for the first half of the day. I have not had much of my normal heartburn, back pain, headaches, swelling, insomnia, early braxton hicks, cramping, or fatigue that I have had with earlier pregnancies, so I am so grateful for this. Cecily is already gaining brownie points with me and I'm hopeful that the last half of my pregnancy will continue to be positive.
If you're thinking I look a little rounder all around, you're right. And if you think I don't look like I've put on weight - photos are deceiving. These are the only four shots of the 15 or so that I took that were the most flattering angle. I'm up to about 15 pounds gained already. This is normal for me. My appetite is ravenous when I'm pregnant, and I workout very little due to not feeling so great and the exercise exacerbating that. I do try to keep up with my yoga stretches, my squats, and my 5 lb dumbbells arm workouts. If the weather ever gets above 30 degrees, I'll probably start walking again. Hopefully that will slow down the weight gain, although I've never had success with that in the past. Thankfully, my vanity this time around is not as strong as it has been in the past. I'm 33, I have almost 4 babies, and I have a lot of other things on my mind. I do plan to lose the weight after the baby is born, and I'm currently making some dietary changes to help things out right now - but I no longer have the same pressure I had before to maintain a certain "image". I'm ok to look like a "Mom" right now. I'm accomplishing a lot right now and feeling great considering. I've never had this healthy a pregnancy before and I'm so happy to be focusing on something other than my looks at this time in my life right now. So this is NOT a fashion post. I dress comfortable, casual, and just try to stay current. These photos are something I like to do to document my pregnancy.
So here we are - about half way through till we meet little Ceci and enjoying the ride so far. I may be grumping about the weather, and over analyzing my law studies, but I'm ever so grateful to have a supportive family, a happy home life, and my easiest pregnancy yet. Praise the Lord for His goodness and for the opportunities and goals He has given me. I need to focus on that more than I focus on the sunshine on the snow. It is a happy time of life right now even in -3 degree weather.